LOLbaby

I've been making up a bunch of LOLbaby pics of Eva lately, and some of them are pretty funny. Here dey is.

50 Girly Questions

50 girl questions, courtesy of catlover...answer them with the truth.

What color is the bra do you have on?
~ Not wearing one (the travails of constant breastfeeding- it's convenient)

Do you straighten your hair everyday?
~ It straightens itself when I blowdry, which is about once a week now.

Do you worry about the size of your boobs?
~ Sometimes...they're too big for my liking/comfort.

What's your favorite girly magazine?
~ Martha Stewart Living

Would you kill for chocolate?
~ Hell yes

Jeans or skirts?
~ Jeans

Do you wear clothes/shoes/jewelry that's uncomfortable?
~ Yes, most bras that I own- see aforementioned too-big boobies.

Did you ever spend all day/night getting pretty for a guy?
~ Yes

Would you leave the house without makeup on?
~ Only to get the mail or take out the trash or go work out

Do you consider making out "unladylike"?
~ Hell no! It's a lot of fun!

On a scale of 1-10, how fun is shopping?
~ 8

Are you spoiled?
~ Not to the point of being ungracious or demanding.

Do you think lipgloss is the best?
~ I prefer Neutrogena lip balm- gloss is too sticky, and my husband won't kiss me if I'm wearing any "gooey crap" on my lips.

Do you freak out if you miss your favorite show?
~ Nah- Spike TV shows CSI: reruns all the time.

Do you yell a lot?
~ Nope

Do you wear sweatpants/pajama pants to school/work?
~ Considering I work at home now, yes. When I was in an office, never!

Accessories make the outfit; true or false?
~ Totally true

Do you like skater boys?
~ Heck yes! My husband is a former sk8r.

Is pink truly the best color in the entire universe?
~ No way. Blue or green. But on a Baby Skwerl, it's mos def cute.

Lip gloss a must?
~ Previously asked, previously answered.

Have you ever dressed unlike yourself to impress a guy?
~ No

Do you often wish there was something you could change about yourself?
~ Yes, but I don't spend too much time on that because most everything can be changed, if I really want to.

Gold or silver?
~ White gold (with diamonds, duh)

The guy that you like/love/whatever, what does his name begin with?
~ C

Do you dress up too much for holidays?
~ Too much? No. Just right!

Do you like wearing dresses?
~ Yes

Do you write a lot of mushy love poems?
~ I've written a few.

On a scale of 1-10, how much do guys confuse you?
~ Guys are crystal clear. It's women that are damn confusing.

What makeup could you not live w/out?
~ Mascara

What I've learned so far about being a mom

Having had the tewtelly adorable Bebeh D'Skwerly around for almost 3 months now has taught me a few things.

Here is a list of some of the stuff I have learned.

~ No matter how diligently you diaper your precious baby, eventually, poop will make its way up her back and all over her clothes.

~ A Sam's Club (or Costco) membership is worth the fees, because you can get a box of 216 Pampers diapers for around $37. (A 40-pack from the grocery store usually runs around $10.) Wipes in bulk and a jumbo sized bottle of Shout have also come in quite handy for the aforementioned poop.

~ The cute little printed terry burp cloths from the baby department are absolutely useless. They soak right through. I've wound up using more sturdy towels out of my kitchen and bathroom instead.

~ All those onesies and footie-jammies sure looked adorable at the beginning, but now that she's almost 3 months old, I'm getting tired of seeing her in only pajamas. Time for some real clothes! Eensy dresses! Tiny jeans! Wee cardigans!

~ The cutest baby socks (Winnie the Pooh socks from Target) were the crappiest fitting. They have wide ankles and tiny feet, leading them to fall off constantly.

~ Disregard everything you hear during pregnancy about what parenthood is going to be like. You really can't know until you get here just how much it changes you, your marriage, and your life.

~ I never imagined I'd enjoy this weird combination of smells on my baby- a mixture of breastmilk, baby powder, and Boudreaux's Butt Paste.

~ The other night, just when I thought I was going to lose it over being awake at 4 a.m. yet again (not having gone to bed at all), I looked down at my baby while she nursed. At that moment, she stopped nursing long enough to smile at me, with milk drooling from the side of her mouth. All was right with the world.

~ My husband has wound up being WAY more neurotic about stuff than I have, which surprised me. (We both have our neuroses, but I thought I'd be the wackier one.)

~ I can't imagine doing this without my husband, and I absolutely cannot fathom why anyone would willingly undertake it alone.

~ Mothers who work outside the home are jealous of those of us who only work inside it, regardless of the fact that I planned it this way with a lot of hard work and a careful choice of a man who wanted to support a family. Not that I blame them- you'd have to be a real sociopath to want to be away from your child(ren) all day long, with someone else doing the raising. But they turn their righteous envy into a shitty attitude and snarky comments about me being "lucky," or that it "must be nice." As my darling husband says, if you're pissing people off, you must be doing something right.

What I've been busy with lately

Meet Baby Skwerl, born on Dec. 6th. Her arrival came as somewhat of a surprise. (Obviously, I knew I was going to have her eventually- the date, however, was earlier than expected.) My OB-Gyn had scheduled an inducement for Dec. 13th because of my high blood pressure, and my regular due date had been Dec. 21st.

When I went in for a non-stress test at 11 a.m. on Dec. 5th after a doctor's appointment, I was told that the baby was experiencing variable decelerations- she was crimping her umbilical cord and causing her heartrate to fluctuate. It was also seen on ultrasound that there was a section of cord wrapped loosely around her neck. The doctor assured me that this was fairly common and not likely a problem, but told me that I would not be going home that day.

In order to maintain control over my labor and delivery, and prevent problems that could arise outside of immediate medical attention, I would be staying in the hospital and having my inducement a week early. Being the control freak that I am, I FREAKED OUT. I pleaded with the doctor to let me at least go home for a few hours to get things squared away- I had so much planned for the next week (Christmas stuff, housecleaning, etc.), and I was in my last days of work with a lot of loose ends needing attention.

No dice. She calmly explained the situation, and insisted that I should stay in the hospital, and said that I would be having my baby the next day. Wow. I called my husband and family, checked into a room in labor and delivery, and waited around until that evening, when they started a Pitocin drip to soften my cervix and prepare for full inducement the next morning.

On Wednesday at about 4:45 a.m. the Pitocin was increased, and labor began. They broke my water around 8:30 a.m., and I had regular (ahem, painful!) contractions until deciding to have the epidural at around 3 p.m. Boy, am I glad I did that!

Labor progressed quickly and painlessly, and by 7:45 p.m., I was dilated enough to begin pushing. After just over an hour and twenty minutes of pushing, our daughter was born with her umbilical cord tightening severely around her neck just as her head delivered. The cord was quickly cut and she was rushed off to the Neonatal ICU. I didn't even get to see her. My husband and I sat stunned and terrified, not knowing what would happen next.

The doctors said she experienced "severe depression" and could have died. Baby Skwerl remained in the NICU for six days, showing marked improvement every day. After the first day, her respirator tube was removed and replaced with a nasal tube delivering oxygen. On the third day, we got to hold her for the first time. It was five days before I got to attempt breastfeeding.

On the sixth day, Tuesday, Dec. 12th, our sweet baby got to come home- healthy and gaining weight.

That's all for now. There's so much more to be said about this entire experience, but right now, I'm turning off my computer and turning my attention back to this adorable tiny girl sleeping on my chest.

Dear Sprint

A cross-post from a blogger I read regularly, the venerable JKrew.

Click me

Random Ten Wednesday

It's Wednesday! Yay!

As of tomorrow, I'll be officially FIVE WEEKS AWAY from my due date. Wow, good grief...has this pregnancy flown by! I really can't believe the baby is almost here. I am looking forward to meeting her. My belly is getting huge, and I'm having a more difficult time walking around, standing, and sleeping.

Two of my aunts threw me a baby shower last weekend, and it was quite nice. We were given many, many lovely gifts for our wee girl by family and friends.

Here's my Random Ten for today!

~Radiohead : Creep
~Shakira: La Pared (Versión Acustica

Eres como una predicción de las buenas
Eres como una dosis alta en las venas

Y el deseo gira en espiral
Porque mi amor por ti es total
Y es para siempre

Después de ti la pared
No me faltes nunca
Debajo el asfalto

Y mas abajo estaría yo

Después de ti la pared
No me faltes nunca
Debajo el asfalto

Y mas abajo estaría yo
Sin ti

Eres la enfermedad y el enfermero
Y ya me has convertido
En tu perro faldero
Sabes que sin ti
Ya yo no soy
Sabes que a donde vayas voy

Naturalmente
Después de ti la pared
No me faltes nunca
Debajo el asfalto
Y mas abajo estaría yo

Después de ti la pared
No me faltes nunca
Debajo el asfalto
Y mas abajo estaría yo
Sin ti

~Frou Frou: Let Go
~Led Zeppelin: Kashmir
~Trans-Siberian Orchestra: Revenge of the Sugar Plum Fairy
~John Mayer: Love Song for No One (Live)
~Jesse Cook: Tango Flamenco
~Plump DJs: Bullet Train
~Paperboy: Ditty
~Fiona Apple: Slow Like Honey

An open invitation for your opinions

I don't do this often - solicit other people's opinions, that is - generally because I live my life by the belief that most people are full of crap. But I have a genuine quandary, and I'd appreciate some insight from outside sources.

It's been mentioned in more than one post that I am an atheist. I used to be Catholic, and was downright bible-thumpin' Christian for a few years before my downward spiral into abject heathenism. I've been secular for about 12 years now - happily so. Living as I do in the Shiny Brass Buckle of Bubba's Big Bible Belt, I am of course surrounded by Christians of all types. Most of the time, we coexist in relative peace. I am not often the subject of rabid proselytizing. The few friends I have at my job are well aware that I'm a non-believer and they are still nice to me. The problem I face is much more subtle - e-mail.

Today alone, I've received five mass emails from coworkers with heavy religious themes. Four of them were the same email- one of those "pass this along to everyone you know" things. Basically, this email says if you love Jesus, you'll forward the email to everybody.

My usual response is to delete the crap, but it's starting to get really old. Christians (and everyone else, for that matter) are more than entitled to their beliefs, but I am not interested. I try to practice responsible email. If a missive contains opinions of any kind, I do my best to only forward it to those I am sure will agree with it. Just because I hold particular beliefs and opinions does not mean others should have to read it, or even receive it.

So save your typing on the "just delete it" suggestion. I've been "just deleting" them, and it's only getting worse. Think about this: If I was sending you atheist propaganda or some political stuff you disagreed with all the time, wouldn't you get tired of it?

I have once gone so far as to ask one girl to not send me anything religious, but apparently she forgot and thus continues to do so. I was polite in my request, and would not be impolite or bashing to anyone else.

What am I supposed to do?